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April 26, 2013
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Whispers

Journal Entry: Fri Apr 26, 2013, 1:08 PM


They echo off the walls,
Resounding in my head,
Haunting my thoughts,
And tearing my dreams apart.
The point out my faults and failures,
Making apparent my flaws.
I'm immersed in a sea of hatred,
And an abyss full of glares.
Misery casts its shadow across the room,
Refusing to refrain its lurking.
It is nourished by the pure disgust,
Vile cruelty,
And utter hatred.
It resides here
Always
By my side.
Soon, my heart swells,
But not with eternal love,
But with hatred.
The whispers cease,
And they transform into screams.
The blood is pounding between my ears,
And I let out a piercing scream
That shatters the rest.
Words hurt me no longer,
I return the glares with a grin,
For when I turn around,
I can see that there are those who will fill my heart with love
Instead of hate.

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Journal Skin by: Dragonda
April 26, 2013
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:iconsabakunoshi:
SabakuNoShi Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Great piece :rose: I love the climate
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:iconreireiserenade:
ReiReiSerenade Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
thanks! :brofist: 
Reply
:iconsabakunoshi:
SabakuNoShi Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
My pleasure :)
Reply
:iconimaginative-lioness:
imaginative-lioness Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
:wow:

This is a truly incredible piece, capturing readers instantly. I honestly think that you have a real talent for writing, and I really enjoy your pieces - especially this one!

Though, I do have some things that I think you could consider. Firstly, I don't like how everything is in one big stanza, instead of few smaller ones. It just makes it a little hard to read. And secondly, you seem to overuse the word 'hatred'. Perhaps you need to think of another word. These are only little things, overall, this poem is really good! :heart:

:heart:
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:iconreireiserenade:
ReiReiSerenade Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so much! and I actually agree with your statement a lot. I don't like the flow of this poem and I didn't really know where exactly I was going with it, but I really appreciate everything you're saying :love:
Reply
:iconcielrulez:
CielRulez Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
kind of creepy in the beginning, but awesome in the end!
Reply
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